Journal Entries June-Sepember 2003
The following are journal entries in my last semester in fieldwork as part of my course in Community Development at UP. We were integrating at a workers' community in Laguna...
June 23 - First arrived at the regional office (RO) of IBM. Place was full of people. Sabak agad. Picket at the regional office of the Department of Labor and Employmant (DOLE) at walking distance. Went back to Manila because of class tomorrow.
June 24 - CD 121 class
June 25-30 - KTPMU and site ocular. Back and forth through Mapagong
July 2-8 - Went thorugh Mapagong, Banana Island, some areas beside the highway.
July 10-13 - Same old. Reading Politics of Sexuality: The seemingly most intimate details of private existence are actually structured by larger social relations.
July 14 - At the Dole office in Intramuros; picket. Workers asserting their rights.
July 16-17 - Some of the people in the office talking about how they were violently dispersed, typical of Filipino's propensity to turn what would otherwise be a tragic moment into humorous punchlines, an adaptation no doubt to brutal realities which we can slightly mitigate.
July 17 - Got invited to LB concert at night.
July 18 - Such a small office yet accommodates the consolidated struggles of workers in their factories.
July 19 - Keep at it. There are no magic keys to organizing. Anything worth doing is obviously not going to be easily done.
July 20 - From Noam: With respect to the responsibility of intellectuals, there are still other, equally disturbing questions. Intellectuals are in a position to expose the lies of governments, to analyze actions according to their causes and motives and often hidden intentions. In the Western world at least, they have the power that comes from political liberty, from access to information and freedom of expression. For a privileged minority, Western democracy provides the leisure, the facilities, and the training to seek the truth lying hidden behind the veil of distortion and misrepresentation, ideology, and class interest through which the events of current history are presented to us. The responsibility of intellectuals, then, are much deeper than what Macdonald calls the "responsibility of peoples," given the unique opportunities that intellectuals enjoy.
July 27 - Oakwood mutiny. Only one of team left. Walked through traffic to Banana to set meet. Also invited Kay and her mom. No luck.
July 28 - SONA
August 1 - Somewhere here wrote why Danding doesn't deserve to even be considered president.
August 2 - It's not easy for formally democratic states to wage war on their own population without taking into consideration public opinion and protocol. That's why the ruling class launches massive campaigns of deception so that people accept their rule as necessary and inevitable.
August 20 -Return of the Jedi...
August 21 - Ninoy Aquino's death anniversary.
August 22 - Empty streets in front of school.
August 23 - went to Banana to set meet. Another stultifying day.
August 24-25 - Writing about the brain: Intelligence seems to be correlated to a brain-to-body mass ratio, along with number of neural circuits plus learning and/in experience.
Aug 27 - It is for the privileged to have access to information, for those with multiple social advantages, to learn from and articulate the wishes and desires of marginalized people in their struggle for a better life.
Aug 29 - Banana. Stayed a while there.
Sept 4 - Think here first met new contacts.
Sept. 7 - Interviewed Len of Fujitsu (management). Couldn't document it.
September 11 - 2nd anniversary of attack on US. If imperialism is the moribund stage of capitalism, then we would expect it to be acting more irrationally, like an old and dying man, as time progresses, but with an internal logic and rationality that we can understand due to the old ways of thinking and systematized education we were brainwashed in, within the system of exploitation and subservience.
Was set to have interview with Fujitsu employee (Carol). She wasn't there. Seems she's hiding. 4pm brainstorming with Gina and Len and other youth. Aching head but still at it.
September 12 - Workers have to struggle to improve and ultimately take control of their political and economic rights, in the recognition that the social order being fed them contradict to a fundemental degree their interests, and that the only way to a better life is to restructure society.
Sept 14 - Met with youth mobilized by Gina.
September 19 - went to Sta. Cruz to get medicines. Long trip. Saw UP Open Uni.
September 21 - Martial Law 31st anniversary. Remembering the martyrs who sacrificed their lives to brighten that dark era. US supported it till the end. We must hold governments responsible for their support of repressive regimes. Day of Med mission.
September 22 - went back to Banana to set planning meet.
It is the responsibility of the community organizer to aid the speeding up of the process of social change towards justice, freedom and equality. Easy to say, hardest thing to do. It is a humbling journey, replete with obstacles, old and new, big and small, but it is a journey we have to traverse if we want to see the horizon. It is a tiring thing, I hope I've done maybe something, at the very least, and all of that time wasn't spent in waste. I'd like to think that I've given all of my spare time besides satisfying my interests. I've made mistakes, some time passed without fruition, but I really do hope I've made a difference in my stay in the university and outside. I still remember the feeling when people become somehow enlightened by something you say, like for example when we went to a town in Glan, Gen. Santos in a coastal community once, and I taught in an educational discussion where a member of the MILF was there. I don't know how to measure what I've done, what we've done, perhaps we shouldn't, but I feel, in a rather mystical way, that something, or some things, are preventing me from achieving what I should be achieving, that I can do more, but somehow I'm stuck here somewhere. It is hardly an appropriate sentiment for someone who's somehow been engaged in it for a relatively long time, but it is easy to lose energy. I have to recharge somewhere, like I've always done. Here's to health.
We have to be responsible for the consequences of our actions, and our inactions. Community develoment certainly provides the venue for that involvement. It is thus our decision whether to participate in it, starting from the communities we're integrated with. Achieving what we want will be an arduous task, a travel from where we are to another world. It will require continuous commitment, critical thought and collective action.
June 23 - First arrived at the regional office (RO) of IBM. Place was full of people. Sabak agad. Picket at the regional office of the Department of Labor and Employmant (DOLE) at walking distance. Went back to Manila because of class tomorrow.
June 24 - CD 121 class
June 25-30 - KTPMU and site ocular. Back and forth through Mapagong
July 2-8 - Went thorugh Mapagong, Banana Island, some areas beside the highway.
July 10-13 - Same old. Reading Politics of Sexuality: The seemingly most intimate details of private existence are actually structured by larger social relations.
July 14 - At the Dole office in Intramuros; picket. Workers asserting their rights.
July 16-17 - Some of the people in the office talking about how they were violently dispersed, typical of Filipino's propensity to turn what would otherwise be a tragic moment into humorous punchlines, an adaptation no doubt to brutal realities which we can slightly mitigate.
July 17 - Got invited to LB concert at night.
July 18 - Such a small office yet accommodates the consolidated struggles of workers in their factories.
July 19 - Keep at it. There are no magic keys to organizing. Anything worth doing is obviously not going to be easily done.
July 20 - From Noam: With respect to the responsibility of intellectuals, there are still other, equally disturbing questions. Intellectuals are in a position to expose the lies of governments, to analyze actions according to their causes and motives and often hidden intentions. In the Western world at least, they have the power that comes from political liberty, from access to information and freedom of expression. For a privileged minority, Western democracy provides the leisure, the facilities, and the training to seek the truth lying hidden behind the veil of distortion and misrepresentation, ideology, and class interest through which the events of current history are presented to us. The responsibility of intellectuals, then, are much deeper than what Macdonald calls the "responsibility of peoples," given the unique opportunities that intellectuals enjoy.
July 27 - Oakwood mutiny. Only one of team left. Walked through traffic to Banana to set meet. Also invited Kay and her mom. No luck.
July 28 - SONA
August 1 - Somewhere here wrote why Danding doesn't deserve to even be considered president.
August 2 - It's not easy for formally democratic states to wage war on their own population without taking into consideration public opinion and protocol. That's why the ruling class launches massive campaigns of deception so that people accept their rule as necessary and inevitable.
August 20 -Return of the Jedi...
August 21 - Ninoy Aquino's death anniversary.
August 22 - Empty streets in front of school.
August 23 - went to Banana to set meet. Another stultifying day.
August 24-25 - Writing about the brain: Intelligence seems to be correlated to a brain-to-body mass ratio, along with number of neural circuits plus learning and/in experience.
Aug 27 - It is for the privileged to have access to information, for those with multiple social advantages, to learn from and articulate the wishes and desires of marginalized people in their struggle for a better life.
Aug 29 - Banana. Stayed a while there.
Sept 4 - Think here first met new contacts.
Sept. 7 - Interviewed Len of Fujitsu (management). Couldn't document it.
September 11 - 2nd anniversary of attack on US. If imperialism is the moribund stage of capitalism, then we would expect it to be acting more irrationally, like an old and dying man, as time progresses, but with an internal logic and rationality that we can understand due to the old ways of thinking and systematized education we were brainwashed in, within the system of exploitation and subservience.
Was set to have interview with Fujitsu employee (Carol). She wasn't there. Seems she's hiding. 4pm brainstorming with Gina and Len and other youth. Aching head but still at it.
September 12 - Workers have to struggle to improve and ultimately take control of their political and economic rights, in the recognition that the social order being fed them contradict to a fundemental degree their interests, and that the only way to a better life is to restructure society.
Sept 14 - Met with youth mobilized by Gina.
September 19 - went to Sta. Cruz to get medicines. Long trip. Saw UP Open Uni.
September 21 - Martial Law 31st anniversary. Remembering the martyrs who sacrificed their lives to brighten that dark era. US supported it till the end. We must hold governments responsible for their support of repressive regimes. Day of Med mission.
September 22 - went back to Banana to set planning meet.
It is the responsibility of the community organizer to aid the speeding up of the process of social change towards justice, freedom and equality. Easy to say, hardest thing to do. It is a humbling journey, replete with obstacles, old and new, big and small, but it is a journey we have to traverse if we want to see the horizon. It is a tiring thing, I hope I've done maybe something, at the very least, and all of that time wasn't spent in waste. I'd like to think that I've given all of my spare time besides satisfying my interests. I've made mistakes, some time passed without fruition, but I really do hope I've made a difference in my stay in the university and outside. I still remember the feeling when people become somehow enlightened by something you say, like for example when we went to a town in Glan, Gen. Santos in a coastal community once, and I taught in an educational discussion where a member of the MILF was there. I don't know how to measure what I've done, what we've done, perhaps we shouldn't, but I feel, in a rather mystical way, that something, or some things, are preventing me from achieving what I should be achieving, that I can do more, but somehow I'm stuck here somewhere. It is hardly an appropriate sentiment for someone who's somehow been engaged in it for a relatively long time, but it is easy to lose energy. I have to recharge somewhere, like I've always done. Here's to health.
We have to be responsible for the consequences of our actions, and our inactions. Community develoment certainly provides the venue for that involvement. It is thus our decision whether to participate in it, starting from the communities we're integrated with. Achieving what we want will be an arduous task, a travel from where we are to another world. It will require continuous commitment, critical thought and collective action.
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